'Au Pied de cochon' ( To the foot of Pig)

Au Pied de cochon! Famous restaurant, acclaimed for its irrelevant name,receives up to a hundred thousand customers per day. I, the chef of "To the foot Pig", am quite pleased with the work I put into creating such a lofty eatery. My restaurant is designed to be energy efficient. The ovens and stoves are solar-powered; In fact, it is our policy to only use solar-power energy. Use electricity or gas or even both and you're fired! The way the restaurant looks is traditionally modern and ostentatious(1). The moment my customers stepped in, from the look of their faces, they felt as if they were outside. They were amazed by my idea to have windows as a roof. Even the regular customers are still amazed--I try to switch up each week. The restaurant has over a hundred windows. They are oval and have much of an Victorian design. Though, the best part about the restaurant, from what I hear, is the menu. Now, I'm not talking about the food. I'll get to that later. When my employees escort the guest to their table, the guest have the pleasure of digitally ordering their menu. They can create combinations all the while staying within their budget.  Now, on to the food! Just as a heads up I change the menu every month. One day I would have smoked lobster, the next I'd have a buffet, the day after that I would serve African, Asian, American, Spanish and European style cuisines. Usually, I do that on special occasions, such as holidays. But due to the ongoing customers, I decided to serve those dishes every other week. For desert it is what the customer decided. And, do NOT worry, whatever the customer chooses we have--we have unlimited resources! As for the employees...I fired them all and got artificially intelligent robots that resemble humans down to the very flesh; However, their personality isn't quite up there. Its passable, but not convincing. So, I don't have to worry about their pay-checks or health benefits. I only set aside money for them, when one of them brake down or malfunction.  As for now, this is all I present to you. I hope to see you at my resturant!

Ostentatious

[os-ten-tey-shuhs, -tuhn-]

---adjective

1.

characterized by or given to pretentious or conspicuous show in an attempt to impress others: an ostentatious dresser.

2.

(of actions, manner, qualities exhibited, etc.) intended to attract notice: Lady Bountiful's ostentatious charity.